“People who are good at self-control … seem to be structuring their lives in a way to avoid having to make a self-control decision in the first place.”—psychologist Brian Galla, quoted by Brian Resnick in the article Why willpower is overrated.
From the same article:
“Structuring your life is a skill. People who do the same activity, like running or meditating, at the same time each day have an easier time accomplishing their goals, he says — not because of their willpower, but because the routine makes it easier.”
Willpower gets used up and simply cannot be used until it is replenished.
Habits, once established, require no willpower.
I’m planning more articles on developing the writing habit. In the meantime here are some I’ve already written:
People selling seminars love to make claims about small goals equaling small gains, and that we have to think big, dream big, have grand goals, even big hairy audacious goals, to ever accomplish anything.
As I am wont to say, balderdash. Poppycock. Piffle. The power of small wins is irrefutable. Check out anything written by Teresa Amabile.
Rosanne Bane explains in her book the solid brain science that we should have firm commitments, and that they should be so small that reaching them is a doddle, and that we should also have goals that stretch us, but which we’re not committed to. In that way we can stretch when it’s good without teaching ourselves to fail by constantly falling short.
It’s popular to tell people to shoot for the moon and even if you miss you’ll land in the stars. It makes good poetry and sells seminars. But brain science says that a goal you can reach is infinitely more motivating than one you can’t, plain and simple.
Those “goals” Rosanne talks about—I call them dreams. I have huge dreams. I take baby steps all the time toward those dreams. If I didn’t have a bright light on my horizon, what would I aim for? But delaying happiness, contentment, the feeling of accomplishment, until “someday” when I get there? Nonsense.
Humans share a handful of fundamental fears. The psychology of fear is complex enough that searching the internet for “fundamental human fears” will provide a million websites by a hundred thousand experts sharing a thousand lists of the true absolute definitive fundamental human fears.
These, though, show up consistently, right after fear of death and dismemberment:
fear of rejection
fear of shame
fear of loss of control (sending our creative work out into the world to be eaten alive by critics, for instance)
You have these fears. No matter how well-adjusted you are, no matter your support network, self-esteem, accomplishments, social status, level of confidence, or anything else, you have these fears.
And just as you can’t choose not to feel the pain when you stub your toe or get punched in the head, you can’t simply choose not to feel the pain of rejection, shame, or loss of control.
Because they’re the same pain.
Let’s ask a UCLA professor of social psychology to weigh in, eh?
Between our great idea, compelling and exciting, and writing it down, something happens.
Why there? Why aren’t we prevented from having the great idea in the first place?
Because thinking is imaginary.
Writing creates reality.
The reality, of course, of our own belief. Just as we see, hear, and feel with our brain, not our eyes, ears, or fingers, we don’t experience reality outside of ourselves, we experience inside our heads.
And our heads are very very good at knowing the difference between imaginary and real. Planning a crime we’ll never commit, in order to write a story, fires very different portions of our brain than, for instance, remembering the time we actually stole something from the five and dime.
In his Monday Morning Memo for December 11, 2017, Roy H. Williams said that some people’s creative efforts were stifled because “every time they’ve done it in the past, a prune-faced martinet weaned on a pickle rapped them on the knuckles with a ruler, rolled his eyes and said, ‘You’re not doing it right.'”
Here are some things you believe:
Your conscious brain makes decisions
Those decisions are based on reason
Emotions prevent good decision-making
Your unconscious manages systems (breathing, circulation, digestion) but stays in the background, except maybe when you’re dreaming
Memory is the act of accessing recordings of sights and sounds stored in your brain
Memories are accurate, because they’re recordings
While things can be forgotten, you can’t remember things that never happened
Memory is a purely mental function, happening only in your brain
If you don’t remember something it doesn’t affect you
Almost two years ago I started my 6th novel. Plotting and planning, then writing like mad. Research, plot adjustments, pondering, and more writing like mad.
Somewhere along the way, it crashed.
More precisely, I crashed.
Flashback to Success
On November 11th of 2011 I released 6 books simultaneously. (11/11/11, get it?) In the previous 6 months I’d written (or compiled) 4 books and co-authored 2 more, all books about business philosophy and process.
I switched to fiction. Finally followed up my first Irish adventure novel with a second, then started another series, and a third.
For the 3rd Monday in a row I’m taking more than an hour to listen to a podcast. I generally have little patience for podcasts; most have a very low signal-to-noise ratio. The 21st Century Creative, hosted by Mark McGuinness of Lateral Action, is all signal, no noise.
Eschewing the rush rush syndrome everyone thinks is appropriate these days, Mark takes his time, 60 to 90 minutes. Each guest ends the show with an artistic challenge; participate and you can win nifty useful books (and, not incidentally, grow artistically and personally.)
Make time for the 21st Century Creative podcast. Your art deserves it.